Not only that, but his farts linger in a room for up to 20 minutes sometimes! And when he farts in the car, it lasts even longer and can be smelled days later. What the hell? I know everyone has stinky farts, but his are excruciatingly bad. Plus, when he takes a dump, the whole back part of the house where the bathroom is is so rank even if he sprays air freshener. I've jokingly told him he needs to see a doctor but of course he isn't going to.
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These are some real stinkers. I was sitting on the floor of a natural amphitheater with a couple of friends, when I knew that I had something special brewing. We talked while the previous night's Las Vegas, all-you-can-eat Mexican buffet and that morning's over-easy eggs and greasy sausage plotted their escape. I would be a liar if I told you there wasn't a bit of a push on my part, but I would be completely within the truth when I tell you I had no idea of the thunderous blast that was to be unleashed on this fine autumn afternoon. Life is short. Just once, fart where you aren't supposed to! I was in gymnastics when I was about 8 or 9 years old, and we were getting help with handstands, where the teacher would hold your back while you kicked up.
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In Britain, land of the elegance and yet the subtle humor, a man recently became famous by the depth and sound quality of his intestinal fragrances. Mister Methane, as the name suggests, is a real masked super-zero whose characteristic seems to be an amazing sphincters control, which he demonstrates by performing various obnoxious musical works, and incidentally, a video in which he made the longest fart ever recorded in the world so far. It's usually in the USA or Japan, since it is often over there where we can witness the most extraordinary - and sometimes pathetic - demonstrations of innovative talents, one might encounter such a genius.